Chapter 17 of 21
Suspicions Confirmed
“That title isn’t sounding too good for you Wormtail,” Remus warned. Peter was making himself as small as possible.
Harry had no idea how he made it through the remainder of the weekend without someone suspecting something was up. He rarely spent any time in the Gryffindor Tower anymore and sleeping was extremely difficult. Every time Harry closed his eyes he imagined Scabbers attacking him. Harry set up a few protection spells around his bed but it still didn’t alleviate his worries. He knew he was being paranoid but he couldn’t help it. How many rats are missing only one toe like Peter Pettigrew would be missing only one finger?
“I bet many,” Peter squeaked, “I bet Scabbers got in a fight or something and he has nothing to do with me.”
“And Scabbers would be missing exactly the same toe?” Lily asked suspiciously.
“Maybe Sirius saw Scabbers and made up all that to gain Harry’s trust,” he tried to defend himself.
“Maybe,” Sirius said calmly, “Unlikely, though. I’d have to have seen Scabbers to do that, and he is always in the dorm isn’t him.” He finished with a raised eyebrow that made Peter shiver.
As the week progressed, everyone had learned to stay far away from one Hermione Granger. It seemed that her overabundance of classes was finally getting to her making her incredibly short tempered. Draco Malfoy had become a victim of that. He had made the mistake of badmouthing Hagrid when Hermione was in a particularly bad mood, earning a punch in the face.
“Oh! I so would have wanted to see that!” James said between laughs.
She had earned a detention from Hagrid but she had become a hero in the Gryffindor Tower.
To serve as proof that Hermione was over stressed, she had even missed a Charms class that very day only for Harry and Ron to find her sleeping in the Common Room. Hermione’s day went from bad to worse when she snapped at Professor Trelawney for once again predicting Harry’s death and stormed out of class. All in all, both Harry and Ron felt that Hermione had completely lost her mind.
“Well, Harry and Ron shouldn’t be so harsh. It’s quite easy to fill compelled to snap at Trelawney,” James said.
“Been there James?” Remus asked.
“Oh, so many times!” James said.
Late that night, Harry was once again having troubles sleeping. With his curiosity getting the better of him, Harry snuck over to his trunk and quietly pulled out the Marauder’s Map. It’s supposed to show everyone, right? So why wouldn’t it show if Scabbers was really Pettigrew? It was worth a shot and Harry really couldn’t think of anything better at the moment.
“The moment of truth Peter,” Remus said in a calm way that would send anyone who knew him running for their life.
Grabbing his wand, Harry crept out of the dorm room while double checking to make sure Crookshanks wasn’t around (which he wasn’t). Slowly, Harry made his way down to the Common Room where the only light was from the slowly dying fire. He moved over towards the source of light as he tapped his wand on the map and murmured “I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”
Once again a map of Hogwarts appeared on the old piece of parchment. Tilting it towards the fire, Harry looked closely to see that Professor Dumbledore was awake and roaming the third floor hallways, Filch was walking around on the first floor with his annoying cat, Mrs. Norris, and Peter Pettigrew was walking right towards them.
“I guess that settles it doesn’t it?” James asked furiously turning to Peter, “You faked your death.” He was rising from his spot and making his way to a trembling Peter.
“No, there has to be an explanation. Please James. You let Sirius get his explanation, please wait for mine,” Peter squeaked.
“Why would you hide as a pet for twelve years Peter?” Remus said with narrowed eyes standing next to James. Sirius had joined them too.
“I don’t know, maybe I was scared Sirius would want to finish the job,” he pleaded.
“Sirius was in Azkaban. You want us to believe you knew he was going to escape,” Lily spat from her place in the floor. Normally she would have gotten up and let Peter get all her temper, but now she thought James, Sirius and Remus had dibs on him.
“Please, lets keep reading, I am sure there’s an explanation,” he begged.
“Ok,” James said calmly. He handed the papers over to Lily and sat down on the floor facing Peter. Sirius and Remus followed his lead, “Let’s keep reading,” he finished with a threatening gleam in his eyes.
WHAT?!?
Looking closer, Harry saw that the dot did indeed say Peter Pettigrew. The dot was moving slowly and was swerving back and forth as if he had too much to drink. How was this possible? Pettigrew was alive? Black had been telling the truth? The entire wizarding world was hunting the wrong man? Was it possible?
No…the map is lying. It has to be.
“Yes,” Peter mumbled.
“The map never lies,” Sirius said through greeted teeth.
Needing to confirm his fears, Harry tapped his wand on the map, muttering “mischief managed,” then hurried up to his dorm room. He tossed the map on his bed before hurrying over to Ron’s four poster bed. He tore open the curtains and said, “Lumos,” lighting up the entire dorm room. The sight that awaited Harry was certainly not what he expected.
Blood was on the sheets as Ron slept; not a lot but certainly enough to be noticed. Panicking, Harry dropped his wand and grabbed Ron’s shoulders. “Ron!” he shouted. “Ron, wake up!”
“Did you hurt Ron too Peter?” James asked icily.
Peter was shaking his head nervously.
Ron’s eyes flew open as he quickly sat up, startled by the wakeup call. He looked at Harry in confusion, slowly registering the alarmed look on Harry’s face. His head cleared instantly the moment he looked down and saw blood on his sheets. Ron let out a scream as he jumped out of bed, waking their roommates.
Neville, Dean and Seamus were instantly out of bed, hurrying over to Ron and Harry. The room quickly lit up allowing everyone to see the blood on Ron’s clothes and sheets. Neville and Dean ran out of the room to fetch Professor McGonagall while Ron quickly checked himself over for injury. Finding nothing, Ron let out a sigh of relief while Harry checked through the sheets.
“Er—Harry?” Ron asked in confusion. “What are you doing?”
Not finding anything, Harry turned to face Ron as he prepared himself for the outburst that was guaranteed to come. I can’t tell him the truth. I can’t tell anyone. “Scabbers isn’t here,” Harry said hesitantly. “This has to be his blood.”
Ron paled as he sat down in shock. “Scabbers?” he asked. Slowly, Ron’s distress turned to anger. “It’s that bloody cat! I told her to keep that beast under control but would she listen!?! NO!”
“Faking your death again Peter?” Remus remarked calmly, “The trick worked once so you tried again?”
Now the shaking of Peter’s head was almost mechanical.
“Mr. Weasley!” Professor McGonagall scolded from the doorway. She entered and noticed the blood on the sheets. “What is going on here?”
Ron glanced over at Harry curiously before turning his full attention to Professor McGonagall. “Harry woke me up and I saw the blood,” he said as he buried his face in his hands. “Scabbers is gone!”
Professor McGonagall let out an obvious sigh of relief as she made her way over to the distraught student and put a hand on his shoulder. “Mr. Weasley, are you certain you are not injured?” she asked. When Ron nodded, she glanced over at Harry who looked away immediately. “Mr. Longbottom, please take Mr. Weasley to see Madam Pomfrey, just to be certain. Mr. Thomas, Mr. Finnegan, please search for Mr. Weasley’s rat. Mr. Potter, please come with me.”
“Why is she taking Harry? He didn’t do anything,” Sirius protested.
Harry held back a frustrated groan as he followed Professor McGonagall out of the dorm room and out of the Gryffindor Tower. He knew what was coming and needed to quickly think of a reason for checking on Ron. Well, I was looking at the Marauder’s Map and saw Peter Pettigrew who I found out was alive and posing as my best friend’s pet rat from my conversation with Sirius Black in the forest. Right, that would go over real well. Why don’t I just tell the entire school Sirius Black is innocent?
“I don’t think they’d believe you,” Lily said.
“Nope, they would probably have someone with Harry around the clock to make sure he didn’t try talking to Sirius again,” Remus remarked.
They entered Professor McGonagall’s office, neither of them saying a word the entire way there. Harry was trying desperately not to appear nervous. How in the world was he going to get out of this?
Professor McGonagall closed the door and hurried to Harry’s side. “Are you all right Harry?” Professor McGonagall asked gently. “You do know that this very likely had nothing to do with Sirius Black, don’t you?”
“How wrong you are Minnie. This has everything to do with me.”
“Sirius, I’ve said this once and I am saying it again, McGonagall doesn’t appreciate you calling her Minnie!” Remus said raising his hands in exasperation.
Harry had to bite back a retort as he nodded, looking anywhere but Professor McGonagall’s face. This had everything to do with Sirius Black but not in the way Professor McGonagall believed. In a way, Harry was touched at McGonagall’s concern but he couldn’t help but think her sentiments should be focused more on Ron who had just lost a beloved pet.
“Harry?” Professor McGonagall asked gently and waited for Harry to finally look at her. “Sirius Black will be found. I give you my word.”
“I sure hope not,” James said, his eyes never leaving Peter who trembled even more at this declaration that James believed Sirius story.
Biting his lower lip, Harry found himself hoping that would happen after Black was found innocent or had a chance to do whatever he was supposedly doing. It was strange that in the process of a few days Harry had gone from hating Sirius Black to silently praying for him. No, don’t do this! Harry scolded himself. Don’t get your hopes up! It could still be a trick!
“Yes,” Peter squeaked, “a trick.”
“I’m finding that very hard to believe,” Remus said.
Professor McGonagall reached out and touched Harry’s shoulder. “Harry would you like for me to call Professor Lupin?” she asked gently. “You really shouldn’t keep everything in.”
Harry shook his head. He needed to figure out what he was going to say to Professor Lupin first. Scabbers vanishing changed everything. Black needed to know that the rat was no longer in the Gryffindor Tower and Professor Lupin needed to know what Harry had seen on the map. He’s going to be so angry with me.
“Probably. You did risk your life going to talk to Sirius,” Lily scolded the pages, “What?” she asked Sirius who was smiling.
“You called me Sirius, not Black. Twice already. We’re growing on you.”
“Hardly,” she huffed but her mouth was finding it very hard to contain a faint smile.
“I—I’m fine,” Harry said softly. “I’m just tired. I haven’t been sleeping well…”
Professor McGonagall nodded. “If you are sure,” she said sounding a little skeptical but didn’t push the matter when Harry nodded. “Very well. I’ll walk you back to the Gryffindor Tower but I do hope you talk to someone about what you’re feeling.”
Harry remained silent as he followed Professor McGonagall back to the Gryffindor Tower. He would talk to someone as soon as he figured out how. Upon entering, Harry saw Hermione sitting in the Common Room with tears in her eyes. Looks like Ron beat me back. He bid Professor McGonagall goodnight then hurried over to her.
Hermione immediately launched herself in his arms and sobbed. “I—I swear it wasn’t Crookshanks!” she said. “He was in my dorm room all night! I—I don’t know what happened to Scabbers! I swear!”
Harry couldn’t do anything but hold her until she calmed down. Glancing around, he noticed that they were alone and held Hermione at arm’s length. If there was anyone he could trust it would be her. “Hermione, I believe you,” he said softly. “Listen, I think Scabbers is still alive. I think he did this and no one else.”
“Yes, tell Hermione. She’s smart. She’ll know what to do,” James urged his son.
Hermione stared at Harry completely confused. “But…that’s not possible,” she said. “Harry, I think you’re thinking too highly of Scabbers. Rats don’t think like we do. They don’t ‘fake’ their deaths.”
Remus snorted, “Depends on the rat.”
“I think Harry needs to explain a little more to Hermione. She does have a point,” Lily scolded Remus. James and Sirius were holding chuckles.
“What?” Remus asked annoyed.
“Oh, Moony. You just joined the club,” Sirius patted his friend, “Nice to know Lily scolds you too.” Remus glared at him.
Looking into her eyes, Harry nodded. “You’re right,” he said. “But Scabbers isn’t a rat. Think about it, Hermione. How long has Scabbers been with the Weasleys? Longer than any normal rat is supposed to live. Why do you think Crookshanks doesn’t like Scabbers? He knows something isn’t right. There are too many questions for it to be ignored.”
Hermione stared at Harry curiously. “Who are you and where is Harry?” she asked. “The Harry I know would never put all this together.”
James, Sirius, Lily and Remus chuckled.
Harry just shrugged. “What can I say?” he said with a grin. “I’ve had a lot of time on my hands. I don’t have really any proof yet. Do you think I’m just grasping at straws here?”
“A little,” Hermione said honestly. “But you do have a point. I remember Ron mentioning how ill Scabbers looked when we were at Diagon Alley. The clerk at Magical Menagerie said that normal rats only lived three years. Scabbers is definitely older than that. The problem is what can we do about it now? Scabbers is gone.”
Harry thought for a moment before letting out a sigh. “We can’t go to Dumbledore or McGonagall with this,” he said. “I’ll talk to Professor Lupin. He and I are overdue for another discussion anyways.”
“Oh, yeah! Moony’s going to get it!” Sirius said and Remus winced.
It took Harry and Hermione nearly the entire next day to convince Ron that Crookshanks had nothing to do with Scabbers death. Ron was still upset though which forced Harry and Hermione to keep Harry’s suspicions from Ron. Hermione confirmed from her research that there wasn’t an Animagus registered as a rat but after looking at the list Harry noticed that there weren’t any stags or large black dogs registered either. Of course Harry kept that part to himself. He wasn’t about to admit to Hermione that he had talked one on one with Sirius Black.
“Why not? She could help him,” Sirius said.
“Yes, and she would also kill him for putting himself on a risky situation,” James said in a ‘you know I’m right’ tone.
After Defense class at the end of the week, Harry glanced over at Hermione and nodded. She took the hint and nodded back before ushering Ron out of the classroom leaving Harry alone with Professor Lupin. Taking in a deep breath, Harry approached the young teacher who was packing up, oblivious that he wasn’t alone.
There was still the chance to back out which Harry was seriously considering. He knew this was going to upset the man. He was prepared for Professor Lupin to call him a liar but he needed to know. This was the only thing Harry could think of to either confirm or deny Black’s accusations. Professor Lupin had helped in creating the Marauder’s Map so who better to ask about it than one of the creators?
“Yeah, and since Moony was the one to research all the spells and charms, he’ll know better then anyone that the map can’t lie,” Sirius said glaring at Peter.
“Er—Professor?” Harry asked softly, causing Professor Lupin to turn around quickly. “Can we talk?”
Professor Lupin looked at Harry for a minute before leaning back against the desk. “Yes, I suppose this is long overdue,” he said and pulled out his wand. With a flick of the wrist, the door closed and locked. “You better take a seat, Harry.”
“Confession time,” Sirius said.
“For who? Moony or Harry?” James asked.
“Both,” Lily answered.
Harry complied as Professor Lupin pulled up a chair so they were sitting across from each other. Neither of them said anything for a few minutes. Harry knew what he had to say but finding a way to say it had become suddenly difficult. There was so much to say Harry didn’t know where to start.
In his best imitation of Albus Dumbledore James said, “The beginning is always a good place to start young Harry.”
Remus looked at Lily and asked, “Lily, may we take action against your future husband?”
“Be my guest,” she answered.
Sirius and Remus cuffed the back of James head simultaneously.
“OW”
“Harry, what I’m going to tell you may be difficult but please hear me out,” Lupin said breaking the silence. He enfolded his hands as he leaned closer, never taking his eyes off of Harry. “I told you your father became an Animagus to help me with my condition which was the truth but he wasn’t alone. Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew also went through the process. Peter turned into a rat and Black…well…Black transformed into a black dog that resembles the Grim.” Lupin reached out and touched Harry’s hand. “Harry, I have reason to believe that Black and Midnight are one in the same.”
“What else is new?” Sirius said rolling his eyes.
“Sirius! Remus doesn’t know Harry knows,” Lily scolded him.
“You know, you can call me Padfoot too.” She rolled her eyes.
There was another silence. If Professor Lupin was waiting for an outburst he was going to be disappointed. “I know,” Harry said softly.
Professor Lupin’s eyes widened. “What?” he asked in surprise. “You know? H—how? We never told anyone.”
Harry let out a sigh as his gaze fell. “Midnight was the only one who knew where I hid my wand,” he admitted. “When Professor Dumbledore said Black had used my wand…it was the only way. No one—not even the Dursleys—knew about my hiding place. Midnight had been in my room when I pulled out my homework one night and saw…everything in there. I figured because he was a dog it wouldn’t matter. I never thought…”
Lupin held his head in his hands as he stared at the table. “Why didn’t you say something?” he asked softly.
“Why didn’t you?” James asked.
“Why didn’t you?” Harry retorted.
“Great minds think alike,” James said pleased.
“James! Don’t insult my son. He’s way smarter than you!” Lily scolded.
Professor Lupin looked at Harry, overwhelmed. “The way you talked about Midnight,” he said. “I could see how much you cared for the dog. I wasn’t about to destroy that by telling you the truth. You were already going through so much that I wanted to protect you from any more heartache. If I had known you knew I would have tried to help you deal with it.”
“See, I wasn’t just lying for the sake of it. I was trying to protect Harry,” Remus pointed at the paragraph on Lily’s hand.
Harry looked away. Honestly, it would have been easier if he hadn’t known the truth about Midnight. “I know,” he said softly, “but I was embarrassed. I trusted a stray dog with my life without a second thought. For that week I forgot that in this world people can change into animals. Midnight didn’t see me like everyone else. He didn’t see me as the-boy-who-lived or a freak. To him, I was normal.”
“Harry, I can’t begin to explain why Black did what he did,”
“Harry can,” Sirius said, “Why don’t you let him.”
Professor Lupin said gently. “I don’t know why he was there for you and tried to protect you from your Uncle. Even his behavior on Halloween is peculiar. I wish I had all the answers but I don’t. Even Dumbledore doesn’t understand Black’s actions. It’s not like him to just sit and wait.”
“Definitely not,” James remarked, “Sirius is really bad at the waiting part.”
Biting his lower lip, Harry prepared himself for a yelling that was about to come. It was then that it hit Harry what could possibly happen. What if Professor Lupin became too angry? What if Lupin didn’t want to be his guardian anymore?
“That would never happen Harry! No matter what you did,” Remus tried to soothe Harry by patting the pages.
“He can’t hear you,” Sirius said. Remus smacked Sirius’ head.
Pushing away the thought, Harry closed his eyes and prayed that wouldn’t happen. “What if there was someone else?” he asked nervously.
Lupin looked at Harry suspiciously. “Like who?” he said slowly.
Slowly, Harry reached in his bag and pulled out the blank parchment that hid the Marauder’s Map. With a flick of the wrist, Harry had his wand in his hand and tapped it on the parchment as he set it on the table. “I solemnly swear I am up to no good,” he said softly and watched as the Marauder’s Map appeared. “You helped make this, right? You were one of them…like my dad.”
Professor Lupin rubbed his forehead as he sat back in his chair. “Where did you get that, Harry?” he asked. “I seem to remember Filch confiscating that quite a few years ago.”
“Fred and George,” Harry said nervously. “They thought I could use it to sneak out to Hogsmeade…which I haven’t done. I—I couldn’t use it like that. It was my dad’s and I was too afraid of the Dementors.”
Lupin nodded. “I understand,” he said calmly, “and I believe you. So I can assume you’ve had it for a while. Why are you bringing it to me now?”
Harry let out a breath before continuing. So far Professor Lupin was taking this better than he had expected. “I—I need to know everything about it,” he said quickly. “Are the people on the map really there or can it fooled? You said the Marauders were pranksters so I didn’t know if it was a joke to have people appear who weren’t there.”
“The map never lies!” Sirius said, “We made it to let us know who was where when we wanted to know. We couldn’t have it lie to us.”
“The map never lies, Harry,” Lupin said carefully. “Why are you questioning it? Who did you see?”
“Peter Pettigrew.”
“And Professor Lupin fainted in shock,” James narrated.
“James I did not faint!” Remus cried.
“I bet you a galleon you did,” Sirius said cheekily.
“You’ll lose that bet,” Remus said angry.
Professor Lupin stared at Harry before letting out a sigh and burying his face in his hands.
Remus extended his hand to Sirius who grabbed a Galleon from his pocket and handed it to Remus scowling.
It was clear that Lupin was desperately trying to keep his emotions under control which made Harry feel even more uncomfortable. He would rather have Professor Lupin yell at him so he knew what his guardian was thinking. He didn’t know if Lupin was angry, disappointed, or just in shock.
“Are you sure?” Lupin asked in a calm and quiet voice. “Are you completely sure you saw Peter on the map?”
Harry nodded. “It was the night Scabbers—er—vanished,” he said uncomfortably as he looked away. “He’s Ron’s rat. When you told me about my dad being an Animagus and since Black was an Animagus…well…I—I don’t know what to think anymore. There’s something else…but I—I can’t tell you. You’ll be mad. You’ll hate me.”
Lupin moved over so he was kneeling beside Harry and put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Harry, listen to me,” he said gently. “I could never hate you. I promise whatever it is, we can work through it but you need to tell me. I can help you, Cub. That is what families do. They help each other. I know I have kept things from you but I was only trying to protect you. I promise whatever you say will stay between us.”
Shaking his head slowly, Harry ignored the tears that started to fall. He didn’t want to make Professor Lupin angry but he just couldn’t keep it in anymore. It was just too hard. He needed someone to tell him he was doing the right thing. “I—I left the castle,” Harry admitted. “Last weekend, when you canceled our lesson. I—I went into the forest.”
“All right,” Professor Lupin said patiently. “Why would you go there? From what I’ve heard you know more than anyone the dangers of the forest.”
“I hate that,” James mumbled.
“What?” Lily asked.
“Moony!” he exclaimed, “Instead of yelling, he keeps making you tell him what you did and makes you nervous because you don’t know what he is going to do, and of course your over active imagination comes back with a million gruesome theories.”
Remus smiled innocently, Lily looked at him approvingly.
Harry closed his eyes as more tears fell. There was no turning back now. “I—I went there b—because that’s where M—Midnight was waiting for me,” he said in a shaky voice. “I—I saw him that night after practice and told him to go there. I had to know why, why he betrayed my parents and why he helped me. It didn’t make any sense. Why would someone who wanted me dead rescue me from my uncle?”
“So Black willingly went to the forest and just waited for you?” Lupin asked in disbelief. “Harry, do you realize the danger you put yourself in?”
“MOONY! Harry was never in danger! I would never hurt him!” Sirius cried in a hurt tone.
“My older self doesn’t know that yet, Sirius!”
Harry nodded. “He didn’t know I knew he was Black,” he continued. “When I saw Midnight in the forest, I stunned him and transfigured a rock into a cage and put him in. I knew Midnight wouldn’t hurt me but I didn’t know about Black. I revived him and…we talked.”
Professor Lupin ran a hand through his hair as he stood up. “What did he say?” he asked reluctantly.
“He said he wasn’t the Secret Keeper,” Harry answered softly, his head bowed. “He said it was Peter. Black was supposed to be the decoy.” Harry’s shoulders slumped forward as he rubbed the back of his neck. “He told me Pettigrew was a rat Animagus. He told me Peter was really Ron’s rat, Scabbers. He said it was Scabbers he was after on Halloween. That was why he warned me.”
Leaning against the desk, Lupin enfolded his arms across his chest as he looked at the distraught teenager.
Sirius was shaking Remus by the collar, “You have to believe him Moony! Please!”
Peter was mumbling ‘no’. Remus disentangled himself from Sirius and Lily continued.
“Harry, I don’t know if I should be extremely angry at you taking such a risk or extremely proud that you pulled it off,” he said. “What were you thinking going out there alone? What if the Dementors had come? He told you Ron’s rat was really Pettigrew?”
Harry nodded slowly. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly. “I know I broke the rules but I swear I’m not helping him. I couldn’t do that to you. I couldn’t betray the only family I’ve ever known.”
“Aw, Harry, I know that,” Remus said happily.
Professor Lupin let out a sigh as he rested a hand on Harry’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “I wish you would have told me before you recklessly risked your life,” he said, “but I can’t criticize you for keeping things from me because I have done the same to you. From now on, let’s both be honest with each other. We’ll figure out how to deal with Sirius Black…together.”
Relieved beyond measure, Harry wrapped his arms around Lupin’s waist and felt his guardian return the embrace. Professor Lupin didn’t hate him. Harry knew it would take work to get used to being completely honest with an adult but he was ready to make the effort. They would help each other find out the truth about what really happened. Both of them knew they couldn’t move on until the past was put completely behind them, a past that consisted of Sirius Black and Peter Pettigrew.
“Did you believe me?” Sirius asked.
“I think I believed Harry. Not necessarily you,” Remus said frowning.
“That’s good enough for me,” Sirius nodded. From the look of horror in Peter’s face he didn’t think that was good for him.